There is one phrase that a boy can never escape.
That is, “Always be confident,” or “Be composed.” The logic was that a man should inherently remain unshaken and hold the center of the family.
Looking back, it was an absurd claim.
Why, of all things, must a man be confident and dignified in every matter?
I, too, had fears.
I wanted to rest comfortably in a safe place, and I naturally possessed the desire to flee or be protected. Nevertheless, the reason I couldn’t bring myself to do so might be because I wasn’t free from the teachings of my childhood.
Moreover, hadn’t I sworn?
That I would no longer run away, that I would discard nothing.
Only now did I believe I could keep that promise. But in this very moment, my clumsy confidence was shattered mercilessly.
Was it because the enemy I had to face was too strong?
Even against that “saint,” I had drawn my sword…